Deep down at our core is a ball of energy that hums and spins and pulsates with life. And the only thing that energy needs to survive is love. But the only way it can receive love is to be seen.
And this can be complicated. Because that ball of energy is hidden beneath layers.
The layer of our personality and temperament, preferences and memories, intellect and religious beliefs.
Beneath a layer of skin and bones, of eyes and hair and muscle.
And beneath one more layer still. The last layer. The outer layer. The thickest one. The hardest one to peel away.
This one is made of pain and hurt and fear. This one is the mask we wear so that we fit, so that we can make it through the day. This one looks like our socially acceptable self or our bully self or our silent self. This layer is the one we put on when we step out into the world, knowing from experience that the blows will come, knowing we must wear the mask and the robe and the gloves so we don’t get knocked down.
Are you familiar with that last layer? Have you noticed that layer on yourself? Or seen that layer on someone else?
But let’s go back to the beginning. Remember that ball of energy we started with? The one that only needs love to survive? The one that must be seen to receive love?
That ball of energy looks exactly the same in each and every one of us. Deep down at our core, beneath the mask and robe and gloves. Beneath the bones and skin and hair. Beneath the personality and religious beliefs and intellect. We are all exactly the same. Needing exactly the same thing to survive.
That is why we need not fear the “other”. Because there is no other. The ball of energy is the same within us all.
This is how we find each other. Not by seeking out the same mask, the same skin, the same religion. It is by looking for the ball of energy. It is by saying, “I see you!” when we find it.
When our core energy connects with another’s core energy, we forget, even if just for that moment, that our outer layers look nothing alike, that our outer layers might not line up at all really.
Maybe by knowing that at our core we are all the same we can begin to lay our fear of different aside and celebrate the kaleidoscope of personality and ethnicity and preferences we represent.
Seek out the people who have earned your trust and let your core be seen, friends. Be attentive to those around you and earn their trust so they too may be seen.
The fear of being seen is very real. And the pain of having had our core hurt when it has been seen is hard. Heartbreaking, actually.
But the loneliness is deadly. We cannot let that happen to each other. We should not. We must not.
This week I encourage you to share your core with one person. And to be a safe place for one person to share their core.
Look for the core. Let your core be seen. There in lies our hope. There in lies our survival. There in lies life.